Write Yourself Alive (I wasn't Dead) 30 Days of Writing

August 23, 2015

Day 23

Dig Deeper: How would you define your Creative Mission? Think long term, (no comma and is the conjunction) and examine your overall message as a writer—or, (no comma or is the conjunction) if not there yet, think of the message you’d like to communicate through your larger body of work.

I don’t know if I have a creative mission. I do know I want people to understand life is not black and white, it is filled with shades of grey and bright colors. Bad things happen to good people it’s how they react to them which provides character.

Writing Prompt: Write a short Writing Manifesto for yourself with 5-10 top goals, you have as a writer combined with reasons you write. They can be as specific or general, abstract or poetic—but they must resonate with what Writing Does for You and what you want to accomplish through it. Think of it as a Creative Contract you make with yourself. Sign it and hang it in your office as a motivational reminder of your Creative Mission.

When I think Manifesto, the Uni-bomber comes to mind. His was pages of illogical rantings against the government. I don’t see writing in the same light.

I write to let the voices in my head be heard. My characters live in my imagination and scream at me to let them loose. They are my dreams and adventures, I have places to go and people to meet. I do much of it in my writing.

I believe the writing has to be believable. Based on things which happen to real people every day, in every place. Some make the news and some don’t.

As to my goals, I wish to have a wider audience. I broader fan base so, I have a monthly income from my writing.

Improving what I write honing my craft so each story I tell is better than the last one.

To impact one person and prevent them from doing something foolish or detrimental to themselves. If one person’s life is changed by what I write, I will have accomplished more than money can buy.

It would be nice to see my name on a best sellers list or a library list of top sellers. Since I learned money can buy you a spot on the NYT list, I am no longer interested in it.

To be recognized by others in my field as a writer of substance would be awesome. “Oh, you write mysteries.” Like it is some kind of drivel.

I have one award, I’d like to see if I can get another. I work no varying the length of my sentences and still being succinct. I don’t write words just to fill some magical number. I did when I started, now I’m looking for substance, clarity, and continuity.

Will I sign this as some kind of contract? If I can figure out exactly how to write it as one, I might. Will I hang it on my office wall? Not likely. For starters I currently have no office. Secondly, my office will be in my home if I ever find one, and I have a plan in my head for how the office will look. This will not be part of it.

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

Just eye rolling

August 22, 2015

Day 22

Dig Deeper: Do you do any creative planning? Do you block specific times for writing in your daily or weekly calendar or do you wait for inspiration?

I don’t block time in yet. Nor do I wait for inspiration. I write when I can find time. Some days I write more than others it depends on what I’m working on and how into the writing groove I get.

Writing Prompt: Write a Sci-fi themed chronological short story describing your first visit to another planet. Do it in a log/diary format, that (which…wish people would learn to use the correct word even my computer knew it was wrong.) occurs over the course of 24 hours. 

Done here. I don’t do sci-fi. I don’t like sci-fi. Don’t read it, not interested in it. Not going to even attempt it as it would sound contrived. Next….

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

Again I have fallen behind.
Day 19 was poetry....not into poetry.
Day 20--just could not identify with...I don't write erotica.

August 21, 2015

Day 21

Dig Deeper: Think of one dream that never turned out to be fact. Why do you think it hasn’t materialized yet? Did any part of the creative process + action needed for this dream fall within your power? Can’t think of a dream I haven’t accomplished. I mean I’m not on a best seller list yet, but I’m heading toward it.

Writing Prompt: Describe an experience that (which) caused you disappointment-through story, poem, or autobiographical reflection. Include your expectations and show how they failed to materialize. Convey the ache of disappointment by painting pictures with words. What does disappointment taste, feel, sound, look, smell like? Reflect on how you deal with disappointment.

Just recently, this past week in fact, I looked at a house to purchase. While there were some things I would change, most were cosmetic. I loved the idea of a backyard pool and the thought of swimming everyday was one I could get used to. While the lot was small it was completely secluded with a six foot privacy fence. So, an offer was made.

The following morning the call came from my real estate agent. They were not going to counter offer because they had three offers on the house. They were asking for last best offer. I made mine. Papers were signed on Wednesday morning and an answer would be given on Wednesday afternoon.

I felt anxious eating only because food is required to remain healthy. I found myself pacing my small apartment. I had family and friends waiting to hear whether or not I was going to be a home owner. The text came saying there was some kind of argument going on with the owners and their real estate agent. We would wait another day.

I tossed and turned sleeping. My mind went over all the reasons I liked the house and all the reasons I didn’t. I found myself trying to picture my office in the house, lined with books and the paint schemes I’d use in each room. I was looking forward to hours by the pool and swimming. I could almost feel the water on my skin.

By mid-afternoon, I had places I had to be and no word yet. I texted my realtor and set out to run errands. The text came through while I was driving. My offer was not accepted.

There was a bitter taste in my mouth. I wondered how much more the other people had been willing to pay. My spirits sagged. As I pulled into the parking lot, my realtor called. The other people had offered the same amount. The difference was they were willing to take the house ‘as is’ and I wanted a home inspection. For me, it was a red flag. What is wrong they don’t want a home inspection? What would I have gotten myself into?

The more I thought about it, the more relieved I was. It was not exactly what I was looking for even if it did have a pool. And I still wonder what is lurking in the house which would have red flagged a home inspection? I know the right house is out there. This was not it. 

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

August 18, 2015

Day 18

Dig Deeper: What makes you feel at your weakest in your writing or creative process? What has the power to bring you down—unless you use the power to transform it? I don’t have a clue what you’re looking for? This question is too vague.

Writing Prompt: Write a magazine article styled (wrong verb) piece in which you adopt the opposing viewpoint from the one you truly hold, about a current newsworthy issue. Seriously???

I don’t do current event discussions. The lead to dissent and generally dissolve into arguments, hard feelings, and aggression. Back to the drawing board. 

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writiing

August 17, 2015

Day 17

Dig Deeper: Have you ever been perceived as “too sensitive,” or as “having too many issues?” Have you perceived others as such? Recall and explain.

Don’t know if I am perceived as being too sensitive, but have often been told I am too naïve. I am very trusting and usually trust the wrong people. It’s a flaw. While I try to correct it, I’m not sure I know how.

As ato my perception of others, I won’t write about friends or family unless I have their permission. So, how I perceive them is not something I will write about.

Writing prompt: Write a recipe for yourself. Write ingredients, the instructions, the results which (that is unacceptable usage here) will follow. Tell us how you are made, how you turn out, and what others can expect when they try. What makes you up? Time to think critically about all the components which(again wrong use of that) helped create you.

No idea how I would begin to do this. The results you get are a unique, eccentric, woman. She is spontaneous, flirty, affectionate, and loyal. She listens when you speak.  Is compassionate and caring. She loves deeply but remains an enigma to all who know her. 

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

I'm playing catch up.
Day 15---I got nothin'. My poetry days are pretty much behind me.

August 16, 2015

Day 16

Dig Deeper: Recall a recent experience that (should be which I detest incorrect grammar) has made you feel vulnerable. Why? What was your default reaction to this vulnerability? Recently my health has not been what it should be, soaring blood sugars and drastically dropping blood pressures have frightened me and left me feeling helpless. I have been forced to learn what to do for these things when they happen, however as someone who lives alone, I need someone who can notice when I am missing. I devised a sign with my landlord and my neighbor. One side says “I’m Okay” and has a smiley face. The flip side says “Still Okay” with another smiley. I turn the sign every morning. This lets them know I have made it through the night and am ready for the day. I’ve also consulted my medical team…yes, I have a team. We are now controlling both the blood pressure and the blood sugars. I am relieved. But, feeling like you might not wake up one day is frightening.

Writing prompt: Open up and pour: While sitting in a noisy place, open up your mind and simply write, stream of consciousness and without editing or judgement, for a full 10 minutes.

Currently overwhelmed and antsy at the same time. Am launching a new part-time business. Today was the kick-off and a thunderstorm came through and took out my internet. Ugh. I was in the middle of a give away. I had just unpacked the box with my ladies and we were talking about this new venture. I had to frantically call my daughter and ask her to tell the two ladies who won, and also explain my loss of internet. At least I was planning to do this over three days. She asked them join me tomorrow same time.

On top of this, I am supposed to at this very moment be on a telephone interview for my book Sanctuary. I lost the internet and the phone number I was supposed to call.  I put a call into my publicist, however she is away from her desk so, I’m not going to get the number from her. Missed opportunity to talk about writing. I really hate when it happens. This is an awesome person to interview with.

Awaiting the arrival of books so I can be ready for the Decatur Book Festival Labor Day weekend. Am looking forward to meeting my design team in person and some of the other authors they represent. A few sales over the weekend would be a bonus. This is just not going to be my day.

Need to set up the  file box for Style Dots, so my paperwork is organized and I know what I’m doing. Also need to put boxes somewhere and just pick up in general.

Waiting to hear if I got the house I offered for. The deal is there are two of us offering for the same house and they asked for last best offer today. I was hoping not to have to go that high. Now it is a matter of wait and see. I hate waiting. Makes me crazy as I am not patient at all. Never have been, want it now. One would think having carried a baby to full term I’d have learned patience. Um, no. Yet, all my friends tell me I have more patience than anyone they know…odd, I don’t see it that way. Maybe my perception is off. Just know this is not how I want to spend my days. Waiting for the phone to ring.  Been there, done that as a kid, hoping the right guy would call. Just hate waiting.

Now I’ve filled up fifteen minutes of rambling, I’m done.

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

Day 13---I got nothin'. Cannot write this without incriminating others, so won't write it. Rather long today, I apologize.

Day 14

Dig Deeper: How or when did life (or people) take your crayons away? I’ve always hidden my crayons. I’ve never let anyone take them away.

Writing Prompt: Describe a day or a morning in your ideal life as a writer or overall creator. If you could live the Writer’s Life you imagine, what would it look like? Go into detail as if it was a page in a novel. Don’t try to make it perfect, dreamy, or unrealistic, keep it down to earth, just like any alternative reality, with its ups and downs-however, one in which your current ideal vision for yourself as a Writer has materialized.

She awoke slowly and stretched, then glanced at her sleeping lover. These were the times she liked best. Slipping out of bed so as not to wake him, she quickly dressed, grabbed her iPod, phone, and set the coffee to start in thirty-minutes, then she was off to the beach.

The waves crashed softly on the shore as it was low tide. A few terns and sea gulls were at the water’s edge picking away at their breakfast. The music filled her head as she took deep breaths and began her walk. She swayed to the beat of the music as her mind whirled with the next scene in the novel she was writing. She listened to her characters as much as she wrote them. Never wanting things to be out of sync with them.

The sun had risen a couple hours ago and its warmth made up for the chill of the ocean breeze. She was halfway through her walk when her phone vibrated. Reaching for it she smiled.

Of course, it was her publicist, Margie, calling. “Hello, Margie.”

“I didn’t wake you did I?”

“No, I was just about to head back to the house from my beach walk.”

“We have an interview lined up for you on Friday, with KWLP radio….”

I tuned out the rest as I headed back to the house. “Text me with the details,” I told her.

Reaching the last ten yards I saw, Alan standing on the porch a coffee in one hand and waving his phone in the other. I jogged toward him wondering what crisis was at hand now.

He’d finished his call and put down his phone as I came up the steps. Wrapping me in a huge hug he said, “I love you.”

“I love you, too. What’s going on?”

“Need to hit the showers and head to the city, they want me on a consult immediately,” he replied not letting me go.

I leaned into him, “Will you be gone long?”

“Just over night.”

Sighing I gave him a kiss before extricating me from his hold. “I’ll start breakfast.”

He let me go and headed for a shower and to pack. Life as normal for us.

After breakfast I walked him to his car and held him a little longer as we said, “Good-bye.”

As he drove out of sight I felt the emptiness his leaving seemed to create. Then I turned and headed for my office. I wanted to capture my morning thoughts on paper before anything else got in the way.

In the office I booted up my computer and pulled up my work in progress. Then I began the scene I’d been working in my mind on the beach. Part way through, my phone rang. Although I was tempted to let it go, I answered.

“Hello.”

“Mom?”

“You were expecting someone else to answer my phone?” I quipped.

“Be serious,” Jess snipped.

“Okay, what’s up?”

With a big sigh she began, “Erik left us.”

It was my turn to be shocked, “What do you mean Erik left you?”

“Erik told me last night he wanted a trial separation. We talked for hours, but he packed his bags this morning and left.” She was crying now.

“Do you need me to come over?” I asked.

“Would you, please?”

“I’m on my way.”

“And, Mom, don’t tell Dad.”

“No problem, he’s had to go in for a briefing for a couple days.”

Hanging up the phone, I looked at my work-in-progress. Well, I sighed, this will keep for another day. I saved what I had written and shut the computer down. Then I grabbed my purse and headed to see what issues my daughter was really having with her husband.

The life of a writer, (this one anyway) is idyllic until real life steps in.

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

August 12, 2015

Day 12

 Dig Deeper: What are some of your most recent encounters with your shadow, your dark side, the monsters in your closet or your “demons?” How do you deal with the negative, darker aspects of your personality? I only have issues with the darker side of my personality when I am depressed. Since it’s been a while since I was depressed, I have no answer.

Writing Prompt: (Made me laugh) Create an alter ego. If you were to lead a double life, what would an alternative YOU look and act like? Think in terms of what you aren’t able to express easily or live out loud as the current YOU. What qualities and traits (positive and negative) would you give this alternative YOU? Describe this interesting character.

I have an alter ego. I’ve had her for over twenty-five years.  Meet Lady Rebecka, Duchess of Lilac. Her castle is on a hill surrounded by lilacs. She lives in a world of yesterday which makes her somewhat naïve and easily hurt. She’s a traveler. She takes lengthy trips then returns to her keep to rejuvenate herself. She is an out of the box thinker and risk taker. Which oft times allows her to make dangerous mistakes. Her life is one of international intrigue, most of which she keeps to herself. (It is my belief, she is secretly penning a memoir, but she won’t open the door for me to see. I also believe she has had many romances, again she keeps those to herself). She delights in afternoon tea. Prefers to have a maid for cleaning. Loves to cook and entertain. The Duchess is a challenge.

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

Well, life got in the way and I missed yesterday's writing completely. I'll put it aside for the end of the program. I struggled with today until I read something someone posted about why they don't write historical fiction.

Day 11

Dig deeper: What is one leap into the dark, one commitment with the unknown-however small-you feel you need to take in order to grow wings? Not sure I know the answer to this. Took a huge leap into the little known in April and moved from my home state to a new state to begin a new chapter of my life. So, not looking for any leaps right now, just trying to settle in.

Writing Prompt: Today, try a new genre, style of writing or topic that you’re uncomfortable with. Anything goes (as far as style or subject)-as long as it stretches your comfort zone. Feel the growth pain. You don’t have to stay there long, but at least give the uncomfortable unknown a try.

This is difficult, I’ve written, poetry, self-help, mystery, thriller, romance, flash fiction, children’s, short story, novella, novel, fairy tales, not sure what’s left. I don’t write Science fiction, I don’t understand the genre. I’m not other world in that aliens and zombies don’t appeal to me. Going to have to think about this and get back to you.

Reading something by someone else gave me an idea on how to start.

Walking through the drafty castle, Elspeth held her candle high. Her bare feet made no sound on the cold floors. She had to get away. It was necessary to warn her father’s returning army of the ambush which awaited them.

She had tucked her hair up under a dark hat borrowed from a page and dressed as a page to the king. Her father, King John Drummond had set out to fight a clan to the south. A messenger had arrived this morning with word the King and his army would return victorious on the morrow.

While her father had been gone, his step-brother, Maxwell, had come out from behind his books to take over the castle. It seems, Maxwell had been waiting for the right time to assert himself. With his rag-tag friends they had faced little opposition and the men of the King’s guard had been imprisoned in the dungeon.

Elspeth was on her way to the dungeon to slip out the underground passage she’d found. Once outside she’s take a hidden boat and cross the moat. From there she hoped the villagers would help her to find the King. It wasn’t much of a plan, but it was the best she had.

There were voices ahead…

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

August 9, 2015

Day 9

Dig Deeper: What is one issue you are passionate about and would like to help others with? How has this same issue impacted your own life? I want to see people reach their full potential. To get the help they need to be productive and move out of poverty. It impacts my life because I have known what it’s like to live pay check to pay check. I had a supportive family who was able and did help me. Not everyone has a support system. In return I work with a program which gives people a hand up.

Writing prompt: Write short blurbs or brief plot synopsis of three novels, non-fiction, or poetry books you have not written.

The Gypsy is a novel of a young gypsy girl Juliette Rush who is able to read the thoughts of others as well as predict things to come. She knows she must guard her secret, yet is disappointed in not being able to predict her own future.

Small Town Shock with be the fifth book in the Macy McVannel series. Macy and Tom find themselves confronted with an incident at the high school which will divide the town. Will they be able to do their jobs and keep the town from open confrontation?

Adventures with Twitter will be a collection of tales involving a young fairy named Twitter, Twit for short. It will delve into the mystical life of fairies.

Yes, those are ideas for real books I fully intend to write. 

Write Yourself Alive 30 Days of Writing

Day 8

Dig Deeper: What treasures have you lost in the fires of life? What would you like to recover? How far are you willing to go? In the fires of life I’ve lost a couple dolls I wish I still had. Seems silly, but not at the time. One thing I’d like to recover which was lost in a flood was an autograph book I had in elementary school. Some wise words were written in there by people I admired. As far as recovering the items, I don’t at this point in my life care to try and do any recovery. I think my memories and the emotion of those times are enough.

Writing prompt: Write a poetic love list of at least 21 details about your human experience that make you fall in love with life and savor it. Try to write at least one sentence for each one and show why you love them vs just listing the items.

1.   The intense eyes as they are focused on a video game, the shyness which overtakes him in a crowd and the funny sense of humor which is my grandson, Jason.

2.   The sparkling blue eyes and energy in motion which make up my enchanting granddaughter, Megan.

3.   The witty sarcasm which underlies her insecurities and makes her the life of any gathering is my daughter, Jamie.

4.   The constant in my life who keeps me balanced and puts up with my idiosyncrasies as well as my mercurial mood swings. The one person who holds my heart, Mike.

5.   Strange as this may seem, the days and weeks I spent at my parents’ cottage in Vanderbilt, Michigan surrounded by wildlife, wind, and trees were some of the most peaceful times in my life. No cell phone, no internet, and not much TV. Just me and the sound of my fingers tapping the keyboard as I worked my way through a novel.

6.   Walking through the woods with no destination in mind. Listening to the sounds of nature and letting them fill my soul. Re-energizing my brain and body.

7.   Driving in rural South Carolina where the live oak trees canopy the roads and the Spanish moss hangs down. The enveloping peace which belongs only there.

8.   Pouring myself into the pages of a good book. Shutting out the world around me to live in the world of the book. Becoming the shadow character or identifying with the main character and living it all.

9.   Long walks on a sandy beach, holding hands, and listening to the waves as they crash upon the shores. Feeling how insignificant I really am in the big scheme of things. Yet, being a part of a magical world.

10.          Looking into the woods beyond my apartment and envisioning the elves, fairies, and gnomes at play. Watching the chameleons run across the railing changing colors and basking in the sun. Reveling in the wonders just outside my door.

Today I’m stopping with ten. I can come up with more, but ten seems more reasonable.